albert, conrad, edgar, george, ivan, kenneth, mickey, and oscar lived in the city.
so did babs, dorothy, felicia, hilda, jenny, lucy, nicole and priscilla.
albert was not a professional hit man.
babs was not a debutante.
albert and babs did not meet in the park on a snowy saturday night.
they never married or had a daughter named cindy who ran for congress and was narrowly defeated.
conrad hated dogs and never owned one.
dorothy thought smoking was disgusting and never took up the habit.
neither conrad nor dorothy ever joined the communist party.
edgar never did crossword puzzles.
felicia never bought a cookbook or was given one for a birthday present or a christmas present and never baked cookies or brownies or made pot roast with baked potatoes.
neither edgar nor felicia was ever abducted by aliens.
george was a surly individual, and never heeded his sister wilhemine’s suggestion that he get out more and perhaps join the ymca and take swimming lessons.
hilda never bought a vcr or a dvd player and continued to go to movies in theaters, long after all her other friends stopped doing so.
ivan was allergic to cats, but did not find that this got him much sympathy from his fellow humans.
jenny never went on long trips, though occasionally she went on short ones in her capacity as a sales representative for gas-powered washing machines.
kenneth was a very lonely person, and would often complain of being so to anyone he thought likely to be sympathetic.
lucy’s parents had been militant atheists and lucy developed an interest in world religions, especially forgotten ones, and took many books on the subject out of the library.
ivan, jenny, kenneth, and lucy never played bridge together.
mickey always insisted on sleeping in a bed, and would never sleep on a couch or in a chair or on the floor or in the back seat of a car, under any circumstances.
nicole hated stuck up people and people who thought they were better than anyone else.
oscar as a child had been struck by the phrase “the life of the party” but when he got older he did not become one.
priscilla never kept a diary.
mickey, nicole, oscar, and priscilla never went square dancing together.
albert, babs, conrad, dorothy, edgar, felicia, george, hilda, ivan, jenny, kenneth, lucy, mickey, nicole, oscar, and priscilla were not killed in a plane crash together, nor were they ever stranded on a desert island together.
it is likely that none of them ever met any of the others at all.
though one two of them might have shared some tastes or enthusiasms, such as for pancakes or miller lite beer or harry potter novels.
it’s getting late.
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