frankie and johnny and eddie

by corinne delmonico

frankie and johnny were lovers frankie was johnny’s girl eddie was johnny’s best friend he started messing around with frankie because that was the kind of guy eddie was the kind of guy who would steal his best friend’s girl johnny got mad where do you get off, he asked eddie, stealing my girl? hold it right there, said frankie i’m not your girl or anybody’s girl get it straight, you mugs, i don’t belong to anybody except to myself, you got that? and with that frankie blew some smoke in the general direction of the mississippi river johnny and eddie were struck dumb they did not know what to say they both left town the next day johnny entered a monastery and became brother john in time he became head monk under his guidance the monastery regained its reputation for sanctity but its vineyards lost some of their luster eddie hitchhiked to memphis where he fell in with a guy known as mean old stagger lee eddie and stagger lee began holding up banks and jewelry stores from kansas city to pittsburgh they got in a shootout outside evansville indiana a federal man’s bullet found the heart of stagger lee eddie got 99 years