are you even trying? - 11. coming clean

by nick nelson

part eleven of 23

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> molloy finished his coffee and blueberry pie, and waited for william wilson to finish his. molloy was a polite person, though maybe not as polite as william wilson. molloy had learned his polite ways in the street, in the school of hard knocks. he learned never to let the other guy know what you were thinking. and the best way to do that was not to think too much. except about the matter at hand. that way you did not clutter up your mind. molloy was starting to get just a little impatient with william wilson, who seemed in no hurry to finish his generous slice of blueberry pie. i wonder, molloy thought, if his buddy was as slow on the draw as this character. if he was, no wonder he got himself killed. finally, the last crumb of william wilson’s blueberry pie was scraped off his plate. feeling better? molloy asked evenly. much better, thank you, william wilson answered imperturbably. i have been thinking, william wilson added. about anything in particular? molloy asked. ii have decided to confide in you. oh? about what? about who collins was looking for. i thought he was looking for a lot of people. you were even kind enough to give me a list of them. he was , but he was looking for one guy in particular. and was this guy on the list? of course, i would not deliberately mislead you. but he was just on the list, i did not underline him, or put an asterisk beside his name, to call particular attention to him. you don’t say so, molloy thought, but aloud he just said, go on. he was looking for frank. there are a lot of franks in the world. maybe on the list you gave me, i have not had time to peruse it that closely. frank fuller. you know him? i know a frank fuller. they call him full tank frank fuller. is that the individual you are referring to? absolutely. frank fuller. and his pal eddie green. out of gas eddie green. that’s him. frank and eddie. takes three of a kind to beat a pair like that. wherever you find frank, you can bet eddie is just around the corner. so what were our friends frank and eddie up to, that somebody was paying you to look them up? well, i don’t really know, that is what we were being paid to find out. and since you are confiding with me now, who might that be? oh, that is still confidential. oh. that is still confidential, molloy repeated. so i guess we are not really that much further along, are we? you can concentrate on frank. and on eddie. maybe you can find out for yourself who is looking for them, and why. thank you. you have been very helpful. molloy got up. and thank you for the coffee and the blueberry pie, i really appreciate it. molloy started for the door. william wilson did not watch him go, but sat staring into space. next

are you even trying? - 10. frank's dream

by nick nelson

part ten of 23

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> frank had to get out of town. it was a big town, and there were a hundred ways out of it. but old man mose had them all covered. frank was wise to mose and all his tricks. he had to wait for his break, that was all. the sun filtered through the high windows of the cavernous train station. frank sat patiently on one of the long benches, surrounded mostly by old men wearing gray hats. then daisy miller came along. she sat down beside frank. not right beside him, but with a space between them. daisy, with her soft curls framing her angelic face. she did not look at frank, or speak to him. frank knew the score, only too well. like delilah with samson, like the queen of sheba with king solomon, like the lady in red with dillinger, daisy was there to finger frank. old man mose’s web was closing in on him. there was no sense just sitting there like a clay pigeon. as casually as he could, frank stood and moved away from the bench, without looking back at daisy. he headed, at a normal pace, for gate a, because it was closest. and there was black joe, heading for it too, from the direction of the news stand. if joe was there, the james brothers, frank and hank, could not be far away. frank casually turned to his right, toward gate b and the cigar stand. he stepped on the foot of one of the old men with a gray hat. oh, excuse me, frank said, but the old man did not answer, or react at all. frank looked closer and saw the old man was dead. he looked around. all the old men in their gray hats sitting on the benches were dead, staring straight ahead. frank realized that everybody in the station was dead… next

are you even trying? - 9. the explanation

by nick nelson

part nine of 23

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> before frank told eddie his own dream, he had to explain eddie’s dream to eddie. because everything has an explanation. the town was eddie’s feeling(s) of inadequacy. the train station was eddie’s mom, who had abandoned him. the trains that were not at the train station were all the siblings that eddie would have had if he had been born 20,000 years ago. the buses were all the big animals - giant bears and sloths and tigers and mastodons that eddie would have had to run from or fight in the year 22,001 b c. the ticket was the magic spear he had been given by the wise man, osmeego, to slay the beasts guarding the castle in the black hills wait a minute, eddie said to frank, what is all this about a wise man and a castle in some black hills? i did not dream about any of those things. they were in the book, the magnificent rebel, by laura j peterson. i guess you must have forgotten, frank replied coolly. i must have, eddie admitted ruefully. i don’t remember much about the book, just the cover, and that it was one of my mom’s books. one of her favorite books, right? frank asked. i don’t remember, eddie said. i really just remember the cover, with a girl with red hair in a leopard skin bikini shoving a spear at some kind of big hairy thing - a caveman or a bear or something. it was your mom’s favorite book, frank said, i know, because it is one of mine too. if you say so, eddie conceded. and the girl with red hair., she must be the one in the red dress at the news stand. she must be, eddie acknowledged, who else would she be? i will tell you who she was, frank said. she was princess little red eagle, the magnificent rebel, leading the rebellion of the humans and neanderthals against the empire of the bear people. she wasn’t that little, eddie said. at least not on the cover. it was just a name, frank assured him. like a guy named bill green, you would not expect him to actually be green, would you? not unless he was from some other galaxy. i remember bill green, eddie said. i remember him very well. he was quite a character. was he the most amazing character you ever met? frank asked. he was indeed. except for you, of course. next

are you even trying? - 8. eddie's dream

by nick nelson

part eight of 23

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> eddie had to get out of town. there was only one way out of town. the train staton. but there were no trains at the train station, only buses. eddie had never been on a bus before. he did not know how to get on one. did you need a ticket? did you pay when you got on the bus? or when you got off? or somewhere in the middle, like in kansas or wyoming? eddie was afraid to ask, he didn’t want to look like a rube. or call attention to himself. he remembered a book he read - the magnificent rebel, by laura j peterson. or maybe it was a movie - they thought they were dirt, starring betty walker and jeffrey hardcastle. either way, when the hero, mitch davis or jeffrey hardcastle, got on the bus, nobody stopped him. but when he sat down in the back of the bus, a couple of secret policemen in black raincoats and white hats asked him where his ticket was. i thought the bus was free, mitch davis told the two secret policemen in black raincoats and white hats, i thought we were all free now. a girl in a red dress in the seat across the aisle from mitch davis started singing or shouting - we are all free now, we are all free now. a song made popular in that long ago summer by ruby and the train whistles, back when the world was young. shut up, you little fried egg, one of the secret policemen snarled at the girl in the red dress, your turn will come, you better believe it. now eddie saw the girl in the red dress , right there in the station, at the news stand, buying a newspaper. he wondered if he had the nerve to ask the girl if he needed a ticket to get on the bus, or if he paid when he got on the bus, or in tennessee in wyoming, or when he got off in san jose california. but as he stood there frozen the girl in the red dress took the change the guy behind the counter gave her and put in her pocket and started walking away with the newspaper she had purchased… eddie wanted to look at the newspaper the girl in the red dress had bought and see what the headline was. but when he approached the news stand he recognized the guy behind the counter… next

are you even trying? - 7. frank and eddie

by nick nelson

part seven of 23

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> eddie woke up. after a few seconds, he remembered where he was. on planet earth, not the planet he had been dreaming in. and who he was, and what he was. he was just a guy. he was not a serial killer. or a homicide detective. or a private detective. or a trained deadly assassin. or a movie star. or a best selling novelist, or any kind of novelist. or a vampire. or a vampire hunter. or a werewolf, or a zombie. he was just a guy. with nothing to do all day. he did not have a job. he only had to report to his supervisor every four days, and he had reported the day before. he had picked up a sandwich the day before, and he ate it. he decided o go for a walk. and then to go look up frank. frank was eddie’s best friend, even though they really did not like each other all that much. they did not see each other as much as people thought. people thought they were inseparable - if you see eddie, they would say, you see frank. but it was not really true. eddie and frank were really very different. eddie had no opinions about anything, and took life one day at a time. frank had an opinion on everything, or at least he said he did. if you asked frank about anything, anything at all, he would never say, i don’t know anything about that, or i don’t care anything about that, he would always have an answer. frank lived with his mom. eddie’s mom had abandoned him when he was only twenty-four years old, and he was a ward of society. on this particular morning, frank was sitting outside the building he and his mom, geraldine, lived in. geraldine was nowhere in sight. eddie nodded to frank, and frank nodded to eddie. i had a crazy dream, eddie said, i had a crazier one, frank replied. but it’s a nice day, so you can go first. next

are you even trying? - 6. distraught

by nick nelson

part six of 23

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> was he looking for some guy? molloy asked william wilson. i guess. that is what we do - look for people. was he looking for a blonde in a red dress? in a red dress? is that her description? did she wear a red dress every day - and at night? she might have been partial to red dresses - wear them more than white or blue or green dresses. i don’t know if he was looking for any woman, blonde or in a red dress or otherwise. why didn’t you say so? i just did. what are you, cracking wise? maybe i should have had you come down to the station, instead of meeting you here in this fine dining establishment like a couple of gentlemen. sorry, i guess i am a bit distraught at the passing of poor collins. distraught. that’s a mighty big word for a boy your size. i learned it in sixth grade, from sister mary agatha. and you remembered it after all these years? she used it a lot. she was always distraught about something or other. let’s get back on track here. who, or what, if anything, was your pal collins looking for, as far as you know? well, we were looking for quite a few people, on and off. we usually have a new case or two, and concentrate on them, but if there is nothing there we might we might try to fill up our workday checking up on something not so new. you sound like a couple of conscientious fellows. just earning a living. you never just take the afternoon off and rest your elbows on a nice smooth bar with some peanuts or pretzels? not me. i am not a boozer and neither was collins. that is the worst thing you can be in this business. if i took a break it was with coffee and a doughnut, like in this place here. i see. so, do you have any idea why mister collins was walking down the corridor of the third floor of the mason hotel, at the particular time he was? no, but i can give you the names of some of the new cases we had, if you think that would help. yes, it might not be much, but it would be something. i hate to keep repeating myself, but there was nothing really hot, nothing to get the old heart pumping, that you guys were working on, am i correct in assuming that? yes, but i have a list here, all written down, of some of the people we were looking for. all written down, how thoughtful. you see i can use two dollar words too. how about the names of the people you were looking for them for? i would prefer to keep them confidential for now, if it all the same to you. you would, huh? molloy stared at wilson for a few seconds. all right, he said, i will let it go for now. this coffee is really pretty good, by the way. i think so, that is why i come here. the jelly doughnuts are good too, but only in the morning. how about in the afternoon? try the blueberry pie. it is still good in the afternoon, and even late at night. next

are you even trying ? - 5. traffic

by nick nelson

part five of 23

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> johnny was getting desperate. the traffic whizzed by without giving hm a passing glance, mostly big rigs, but an occasional pontiac or studebaker driven by a guy smoking a cigar or a blonde in a low cut red dress. it was only a matter of minutes before he would hear the sound of the sirens of the highway patrol. i will count to a hundred, johnny thought. if nobody stops for me by then, i will have to get off the road. he started counting, but kept walking. ten… nine… eight… seven… six… he heard the sound of tires behind him hitting the gravel by the side of the road. <> hey kid, want a lift? sure, johnny replied nonchalantly. i don’t mind if i do. the rig stopped, and the driver looked down at him. get in. i got some business to attend to, i will be right back. the driver climbed down from the cab and disappeared into the scrub by the side of the highway. johnny went around to the passenger side and climbed up into the cab. he did not look back down the highway as he did so. the driver had left the motor running, and the key in the ignition. johnny kept his eyes on the rear view mirror. after about four minutes, he saw a highway patrol car coming up, but with no lights or siren. the patrol car passed by. just as it was going past, the driver returned from attending to his business. nice day, the driver said. yes, it is, johnny agreed. you are a trusting person, he added with a smile. how do you figure? you left the motor running. just saying. do you know how to drive one of these? i never have, then you don’t know how, the driver laughed. i might have, johnny said. but you didn’t, did you? they got back on the road. where you headed, the driver asked. cincinnati popped into johnny’s head. cleveland, he said. i am going as far as pittsburgh. next